Fatness (with a F, not a Ph), Puffness (with a P, not a B)

Overweight people with a Diet Coke in one hand, phone on the other, talking about how diets don't work while ordering a Caramel Macchiato with extra whip from Starbucks crack me up to no end.

Meatheads who are wider than they are tall. 5' 6" guys with biceps the size of a volleyball also make me chuckle.